One of my goals as a mother is to raise my kids to be grateful. I want them to appreciate what they have. I also believe that by taking the time to stop and recognize the good, they will be happier little people. This actually applies to all of us, adult and children alike. One of the ways I've tried to incorporate this into our lives is to ask my kids a simple question every night at bed time.
"What was your favourite part of the day?"
Even our bad days, have some good in them. This simple questions changes the tune of the evening and it changes their mindsets as they drift off to sleep. By thinking about the good parts of the day right before bed, they fall asleep feeling more grateful, happier, and loved. It seems so simple, and it has had a great effect on their attitudes. Occasionally during the day, they stop and think out loud, noting how what they are doing in that moment is going to be their favourite part of the day! They enjoy that moment and are living more fully aware of the joy they are experiencing. One of the most beautiful things about it, almost 100% of the time, their favourite part of the day was about something they did, not something they got. Material items take the backseat almost every time.
My youngest has often bounced out of bed in the morning exclaiming that: "Today is going to be the best day ever, it will be my favourite day!" I don't know about you, but that's not often my first thought of the day. I wish it were! We would all have better days if we held that attitude daily.
This question offers them a nice transition, from a busy day - to resting and getting ready to fall asleep. My kids think back on all that was accomplished, on the fun that they had, on the yummy food that they ate. They focus on positive thoughts. They fall asleep feeling grateful.
It's always interesting to hear what they come up with as their favourite thing. As a parent it helps you learn more about your kids. It shows you what their likes are. Where their interests lie. If they are having a bad day, or if they've had a great day. It gives you an inside look at what's important to them. As a parent, these are important things to know so you can help them grow to be the best they can be. You can take what you are learning from them and support them in these areas.
Sometimes, it's just plain funny what they come up with. And be prepared, often my kids need to know what my favourite part of the day was too. If your favourite part, includes doing something with them, that just makes them feel extra loved. Answer honestly, sometime I say that it was doing something with their Dad. It's a great way for them to see that your marriage is super important as well. Or mention a hobby, it shows them that you have your own interests, things you enjoy doing. How often as parents do we focus so much on our kids that they may not even think about us as people beyond "Mom and Dad"?
Now, kids will still be kids....you may be thinking.....seriously?! This will just delay the bedtime routine even more. Already it takes FOREVER to get them in bed and keep them there! I get it, I do. We've had to set some rules. They can tell us their top favourite thing, the first one that comes into their heads, and then if they have more favourites, they can think about them and tell us in the morning. Otherwise we'd be standing there all night listening to every little part of the day played out. Some nights, it does end up being a little longer than others, but the time has become a blessing for each of us and helped all of us to be thankful for what we have and to focus on how blessed we are.
It would be a great practice to ask yourself the same question at the end of each day.
"What was your favourite part of the day?"
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